The Benevolent...non-nurturing of females...

Have you ever heard of benevolent sexism? Well, let's talk about benevolent sexism...

Benevolent sexism is discrimination against one sex from an honest-to-goodness place stemming from one's values. You could say that it's sexism done from a place of love.

Example:

A boss-man hires two employees with the same qualifications to similar positions. One is female and one is male.

This boss-man (unbeknownst to either employee) has a special place in his heart reserved for protecting women. To protect his female employee, he gives the harder tasks to the male.

Not too shabby for the female worker, right? 

WRONG.

Overtime, the male worker becomes accustomed to harder work and the female worker becomes accustomed to the easy stuff. When they apply for a promotion, the male is far more qualified. They may have started off as equals but because the boss wanted to protect the woman, she has fallen behind.

Why I am bringing this up... I'm going to be very vague so that these people aren't identifiable.

I carpooled with two guys the other day to a location. As we drove down the freeway, we laughed and chatted about things. Then one of them called me "cute" in a non-flirtatious way after I tried to be funny. I didn't really think much about benevolent sexism at the moment because I felt embarrassed--being told you're cute after cracking a joke is another way of saying that the joke was not funny. 

Later, as we were driving back from the location, I tried to join in the banter again. Again, I was called "cute." This time it was because I joined in an emotional reaction to something they were reacting to.

Then later in the drive, they tried to have an intellectual conversation on a subject I had already formed many opinions. I shared my thoughts and I interrupted some of their thoughtful silences. They listened to my interruptions--one of them responding to my thoughts--but then they carried on as if I hadn't spoke. The one who had been calling me cute ignored me the most. I interrupted about two more times before giving up. 

When the conversation returned to a more emotional/exciting subject, my feedback was welcomed. I was called cute again and given attention probably because it was something emotionally related and, as a female, my cute little reactions were sought after.

EXPLETIVES.

Pretty demeaning, huh?

Only close friends or my fiance should be calling me cute. Think of Zootopia.

Speaking of my fiance... 

It's nice to be adored for being me.